Noble's Monocle

One hardly knows where to begin with this but averting the eyes might be a start. Now, I know its an orc and the wretched creature probably doesn’t know any better but I think it’s obvious to the rest of us that this Lara Croft look simply isn’t working for you, dear boy. I don’t know precisely what it says about the Azerothian High Street, but it’s assuredly something dreadful, that I have to emphasise a fact that should be self-evident, even to the lower races, but:


I cannot even begin to unravel the thought processes that went on behind this choice – assuming there were any – but I can only presume it’s a bid for, and this is shudder-inducing believe me, rugged and sexy.

Dear boy, trust me when I say that when it comes to Putting Out: less is more. There is simply far too much Put available to the general public here.

As something positive to take away from this, dear boy, I do think you’re right to emphasise your legs; they are your best feature and mercifully they detract attention from your face which is quite frankly dreadful. However, I think some well tailored leathers, or some form-fitting seamed trousers, would do the job far more effectively than crotchless gimp shorts.

Ciao darlings,
Agrimony